Home Buying Tips
Lessons From a First-Time Home Buyer: Do You Know Your Neighbors?
A funny thing happened to me as I set off on my way to FinCon last week. As I got into my Uber, the driver said, “We don’t know each other, but I actually live right over here.” By “right over here,” he literally meant two doors down. After making this realization, we chatted a bit about the neighborhood as he drove me to the airport (and, once I arrived, I of course had to give him a larger-than-normal tip). It was an interesting experience that made me wonder, why is it that we don’t know more of our neighbors?
When we first started to move in, we made it a point to meet the neighbor next to us. After all, we were going to share a wall (all of the houses in our neighborhood are duplexes), so it seemed like a good idea. We even compiled a bag of Lindt chocolates to bring them in a bid to start things off on the right foot. Then, a few weeks after we moved in, we ran into our neighbor on the other side of us, whose house isn’t actually attached to ours but whose backyard seamlessly merges with ours, as there is no fence between us. Alas, we didn’t gift them with any chocolates or anything.
Outside of that, though, we haven’t met many others in our neighborhood — with a few exceptions. Not long after the family two doors over (the opposite direction of my Uber driver) rented out their house, we met their tenants. That was mostly due to the fact that they use their garage as a man cave and frequently leave the door open, allowing for more chance meetings than normal.
Meanwhile, my wife met another couple while I was away as they helped her push the car back into our driveway after she got stuck in the snow. With an unexpected snow day that meant no work for her, she subsequently baked a batch of cookies to take over to them and show her thanks.
So why is it that we don’t know more of the people who live around us? While I can’t speak for them, on my end, I just feel awkward about it — especially now that so much time has passed. Meeting people as you encounter them for the first time after moving in makes sense… but going up to them randomly after nearly two years seems strange.
Should I have made an effort earlier? Probably. But the other issue is that you never know when it’s a good time. For example, the vast majority of the time that I spot my neighbors at all is because I’m taking my dog outside. What if they don’t like dogs and don’t want to be approached by one? What if my dog doesn’t behave well and embarrasses me? What if they’re busy and just want to get inside their house? These are the hang-ups that have prevented me from making a formal introduction all this time later.
That said, I have become a master of the neighborly wave. When you see a car you recognize or you drive past someone out front, you give them a little wave to say “hi.” Obviously, that’s more than enough, right?
After spending so long in apartments and being an introvert by nature, it seems I still haven’t adjusted to the neighborhood component of home ownership. However, as we’ve seen some turnover in our area recently, perhaps I’ll have another chance to do the right thing.
With that, I ask you: do you know your neighbors?